“Be the change you want to see in this world.”
Mahatma Gandhi
Have you ever gotten to a place and don’t remember how you got there? You obviously knew where you were going because you got there but the process of getting there was a mystery. For example, along the way to your destination did you notice that house with the new ‘For Sale’ sign, or the tree along the curb that needs watering, or the cat hiding under the bush, or the pothole you barely missed?
Our thoughts can take us on rides of their own making. In fact, it’s actually easy to get into a sour mood and not know how you got there too. Do your busy thoughts take you to a field of dreams or a field of nightmares?
With extra time on our hands there are most likely extra thoughts ruminating in our heads as well. Worries about the future along with worries about here and now. Since we don’t seem to have much control over this strange virus running asymptomatically amok among us, let’s bring attention to one thing you and I have complete control over – our very own thoughts.
When you see a negative swirl of thoughts starting to gather in your mind, here’s a new game of one player (you) called, Catch and Reframe.
Here’s how it goes…
Suppose you’re looking out the window and your mind starts to drift to an argument you had with someone. You start getting angry thinking about how unfair the situation is and how you’re misunderstood. Perhaps you’re feeling hopeless as to how to fix this difficult but important relationship.
First, Catch your thought:
Catch: What do I care what they think of me anyway?
Next, Reframe your thought:
Reframe: I’m a caring person and this person is important to me.
Another thought:
Catch: I can’t stand them!
Reframe: I’m so angry because I do care (great read: Healing Anger by Dalai Lama).
Another thought:
Catch: We’re opposites -They’ll never understand me.
Reframe: Imagine myself walking in their shoes –
How would I want to be approached if I were walking their walk?
So, the two steps are:
1) Catch the negative thought.
2) Reframe the thought.
These times of social distancing can help us in learning more about who we are and very importantly, who we want to become.